***

Time went by quickly. I turned twenty-one, and on the day I became a year older, I spent time at a hotel with Yeon Woojeong. Dear 21-year-old Kim Jiho. Congratulations. He whispered to me as our foreheads touched. 

On January 1, I had rice cake soup. I got my driver’s license over winter break, and Yeon Woojeong was transferred to Suwon. Luckily, it was close enough that the commute wasn’t too long.

Last month, Yeon Woojeong told me that he was going to appear in court, so I attended the trial for the first time. Although it wasn’t as dramatic or filled with heated shouts as portrayed in dramas and movies, it was satisfying to see Yeon Woojeong at work. He, who remained calm and collected throughout, smiled at me at the end. 

His legal attire suited him very well. If the black suit made him look like a prosecutor who wouldn’t flinch even if stabbed, this attire made him look dignified. Anyway, I wanted to take a picture, but Yeon Woojeong was the first to take me to the front of the prosecutor’s office. We stood side by side in a place with a good view of the building and took a picture. Then he gave me a print of it and told me to put it inside my military locker.

In the summer, we traveled to Damyang. Knowing it was my last trip before enlisting in the army, I was wistful of the passing time, and everything I saw looked good. As we walked slowly through the bamboo grove with the wind gently blowing, the back of Yeon Woojeong’s head looked so vivid.

Usually, we walked side by side, but that day, for some reason, I wanted to see his back, so I took a step back. The light blue shirt I bought him fluttered slightly in the breeze. His steps were slow but light. The air was crisp, and the sound of each gust of wind made a small ruckus in my chest. It wasn’t a bad thing. It was just… this moment was exhilarating.

“You know what?”

Yeon Woojeong opened his mouth without looking back, his voice sounding a little clearer than usual.

“Even during the day, the bamboo forest is haunted.”

“… What are you talking about so suddenly?”

Just as I was thinking this was a random remark, I remembered the horror movie we watched yesterday. Although Yeon Woojeong explained that it was technically more of a mystery than a horror movie, to me, it was just a plain creepy horror movie. Despite my halting steps, Yeon Woojeong didn’t stop. I turned my head to look around and I saw a long stretch of bamboo forest in the shadows. Right then, the wind blew again, making an eerie sound. I hurried over and stood by Yeon Woojeong’s side.

“Hey, is that a true story?”

“No way.”

He looked back at me and smirked. He got me. I frowned, never expecting that he would play me like this.

“Is it okay for a prosecutor to lie like that?”

“Who cares? I’m not a prosecutor here.”

“Then I’ll call you by name, okay?”

“Do it.”

Despite my threat, Yeon Woojeong replied in a nonchalant manner. Seeing him responding like that, the emotions that had been building up subsided. Instead of calling him by name, I took his hand and he let out a small laugh.

“Do you believe in things like ghosts, Mr. Yeon?”

“No.”

“Why?”

“Just because. Do you believe it?”

“I don’t believe it, but…”

When I was younger, I used to stay home alone a lot. Although I preferred to be alone, I was a little scared at night. My house was on the side of the road, so I could hear everything outside, and the walls were low, so even if I locked the door tightly, I couldn’t completely shake the anxiety. But looking back, I realized that it wasn’t the ghosts I was afraid of, it was the people. 

I shook my head. Whether ghosts exist or not was irrelevant to me. But… I’d prefer it if they existed.

“If you die someday…”

It was a question that suddenly came to mind, but thinking of it was enough to put my mood down. As I closed my mouth, Yeon Woojeong tilted his head.

“If I die?”

“… Do you want to be a ghost?”

“Hm?”

Yeon Woojeong raised his eyebrows and smiled as if it was a silly question. But I pressed for his answer quite seriously, and he soon answered.

“No.”

“Why?”

“I don’t really want to be a ghost.”

“Then what about me?”

“Huh?” 

“How will you meet me then?”

I didn’t know if there was a world after death and it wasn’t something I’d ever wondered about until now. But once I thought about it, if such a world didn’t exist, Yeon Woojeong and I wouldn’t have a chance to meet. So, wouldn’t it be better if there was a heaven or a hell?

“Mhm…”

Letting out a low voice, Yeon Woojeong looked deep in thought and caressed his thumb over my hand. After a few minutes, he spoke.

“Isn’t reincarnation better? I mean, in terms of the afterlife.”

“Reincarnation?”

“Yeah. Let’s not be a ghost and live a new life.”

He smiled mischievously and squeezed my hand. Reincarnation. That certainly sounded better than being a ghost. But if I was reborn, how would I recognize Yeon Woojeong?

“Won’t we have no memory if we reincarnated? How would I find you?”

“Why? You think you can’t find me?”

“Do you think you can find me, Mr. Yeon?”

“Of course, I can.”

“… Me, too.”

Ghosts and reincarnation. Even though it was all nonsense, Yeon Woojeong didn’t tell me off and answered me seriously until the end. Maybe that was it. The reason why my feelings for him seemed to grow deeper and deeper. I wanted to hug him tight. I thought it would be nice if he and I could mix and become one.

Whatever would happen after death didn’t matter now. What mattered most was the present, when Yeon Woojeong and I were in this moment. I held his hand tighter as we walked. Soon, a crossroads appeared in front of us. 

There were two arrow-shaped signs at the crossroads, the left arrow saying “The Road of Fortune” and the right arrow saying “The Road of Unchanging Love”. While Yeon Woojeong scanned the signs, I led him straight to the right. His laughter tickled my ears. 

There was a gazebo along the way, so we took a break and sat side by side. On the other side was a small waterfall, and the sound of the water made the air feel cooler.

“Mr. Yeon.”

“Hmm.”

“How about we live in a place like this later?”

“Do you like this place?”

“It’s cool here. You get hot easily, don’t you?”

We could just turn on the air conditioner indoors, but sometimes it would be nice to open the window and let the breeze come in like this. I lifted my hand and touched Yeon Woojeong’s neck. It would feel cold in the air conditioner breeze, but right now it was just right. He tilted his head, putting my hand between his head and shoulder, then released it.

“Yeah, it wouldn’t be so bad to live in a remote place like this.”

“Yeah.”

“And there are ghosts around.”

“Why do you keep mentioning ghosts?”

I frowned, and Yeon Woojeong laughed with his shoulders heaved.

“I mean, I keep remembering it. When you got scared yesterday.”

“I wasn’t scared.” 

“Aha, so you weren’t scared?”

Despite deliberately stiffening my face, Yeon Woojeong looked back at me with a smile on his lips. His gaze was warm. Not wanting to show my straight face too often, I relaxed the corners of my mouth, lowered my head, and nudged Yeon Woojeong’s shoulder with my forehead. 

He brought his hand up to stroke the nape of my neck. When I lifted my head, he pressed his forehead against mine. I naturally closed my eyes and our lips touched. A cool breeze passed between us.